There’s a theory—which I would say is proven—that when a female spends a lot of time in close quarters with other females, they all end up on the same cycle. With that said, on days like today, I feel extremely bad for all of our men here in the office. They are surrounded by women working at a beauty company Every. Single. Day. With all of us guwils being under a certain age, it can happen at any moment, strike at any time and blindside anyone within 10 feet at any hour or day of the year. This got me wondering, as my face is feeling like the Sahara, aside from the obvious emotional changes, what kind of effect does a menstrual cycle and PMS have on our skin? Are we OOZING it through our pores? Is my yelling across the office not enough of a red flag? Well my dear, hormones play a huge role in how your skin works. Here are the facts:
Not only are you more sensitive emotionally, (‘But you didn’t say it like you meant it!’) your skin is more sensitive when you’re PMSing, right down to your fingernails. When estrogen levels drop, your skin loses that precious substance called water, so it dries out and is more susceptible to touch and irritation. If you’re wondering why that manicure wasn’t so pampering this week, now you have the answer my friend.
You want the bad news or the bad news? Ready or not, the fat layer in your skin is thickest during that time of the month. That bloating is really there, by about 7% in your abs and about 4% on your thighs! Feel terrible enough yet? Scientific studies could attribute this to water retention, so keep this in mind when you want to scarf down those Cheetos slathered in nacho cheese and topped with kosher salt.
Your skin can be at its driest during your period. When estrogen levels are at their peak about 1 day before it starts, your pores will be at their smallest. It’s simple: Estrogen suppresses sebum production; therefore your skin will be less oily than normal. However, when your estrogen levels drop a week before your period, your oil glands are at their most active. Buckle up.
So kids, the solution to this is to hoard as many beauty products as possible and lock yourself in a closet with a bottle of wine and a plate of pasta. Just don’t go out in public at all. Be prepared for anything and take no prisoners. (I’m kidding.)
Since the prevalence of PMS is estimated to be between 3% – 30%, we asked the men in our office for their tips for coping with a female co-worker on their cycle. Survey says:
- You see a purse being carried to the restroom – Just stay away. “If I bought cookies for every girl in here every time they were PMSing, I would be broke.’
- Avoid disagreeing and extended conversations. ‘Little snippets of acute aggression followed by a slouched lack-luster look – Back away slowly.’
- Keep calm and collected. ‘If you are dealing with someone that’s being difficult just keep an even head and be nice to people. Creating any arguments at work is never good.’
- Just stay away.
To this, I bid you adieu and God speed.